Is Art Truly Resistance?

why I no longer consider myself a "filmmaker"

I am trying to date when I started to question how best to use my labor.

And by labor, I mean that of my heart and mind as well as my body. I generally attribute it to getting to attend an American prep school from age 15 through 17. It was intensely politicizing because, coming from humble means, I recognized it as an obvious privilege; the education, facilities, opportunities, and social circles were far superior to what I had at home. Yet most participants there seemed to take it for granted and felt it their due. I saw how fragile life was in many ways, as I could easily have missed out on all that. It changed the course of my life.

I am now once again at a transition point I don’t feel generally prepared for. I like to think I am sensitive to everyone’s needs and struggles, but feeling and living it now, it also clarifies for me how much I took for granted my entire life. I’ve had it good. Although the times I lived in certainly influenced the choices I made, I couldn’t have lived in better times for what I chose to do than the time I’ve lived in. I was very fortunate. And to say that “I’ve had it good” is not to gloat, but really quite the opposite: how do I now compensate for what I didn’t really deserve?

Even before I embraced using my labor with intention, I took on the mission to leave all better than I found it. These two tasks are very much linked, but it is the latter that was and is my preference in all social contracts. It only makes sense to do something that elevates all. Even if few do…

Add that up, will you? I want to leave things better than I found them, yet I know I have it better than most. If life is a three-act structure, I am definitely in my third act now. I know I can get a lot done in the remaining time, but from the second half of Act One onwards, I’ve driven forward with a single-mindedness that I don’t quite know how to shake now. Can I change before the bell rings? Do I need to? Will that be the best way forward if I do? Will it be the best use of my labor?

I am a film producer. That’s the identity I have come to wear. I wanted to be a film producer since well before I was willing to admit that I was. Once I achieved it, I tried to broaden what I felt “producing” meant. I work hard to go beyond just making a film. I try to influence the system I am in more than it can influence me. I try to make the world a better place for the things I love, particularly the type of cinema I love… and yeah of course the people I love.

I make a particular type of film, one easiest described as “movies for grown-ups”. You can also call them the movies America doesn’t seem to want anymore. That’s why I call the time my career took off the best time for what I wanted to do – once upon a time America embraced intelligent, complex, authored cinema for adults – and it made it better to try to make exactly that. Much better. Much better than it is today that’s for sure — because there’s little room for that sort now.

For the most part, the question I debate myself with is “to make films or to try to improve the system for making films”. I’ve learned a lot, and I feel that under the right conditions I could make better films now than I was ever capable of before. On the other hand, as I’ve observed most people in the cinema industries want to make films and few want to make a better system, I may be more needed doing the latter, particularly if the conditions have led to a cultural abandonment of films for grown-ups.

Do we already have enough movies from people like me? I see far more movies than most people, even than most filmmakers, and I see a lot of films I think we could do without. I think that money and time and energy would be better spent in other ways, like — if we are going to stick with focusing on art and culture — building a better system for the better version of those movies.

But then I read the morning news and opinions. The general writings and musings. War. Hate. Corruption. Prejudice. Injustice. Inequality. And it feels like is all going to shit. Or worse. To think that it was ever better perhaps was a manipulation if not an outright brainwashing. To say that America was built on oppression or genocide is not a lie or distortion, even if it seems to be a relative new thing to admit. I tried to recognize where it first came from, and perhaps that is “A People’s History Of America”, but it does seem to be particularly on trend now. Everyone’s saying it. We are overwhelmed. And perhaps it is because we are all trying to make sense of the morning news, opinions, writings, and musings. And it is horrifying. Each and every day.

The downward turn of everything – politically, culturally, socially -- is truly depressing and it is hard to resist total surrender. No one likes hopelessness though, do they? We are trained to resist. To rebel. To dissent. Is it foolish to believe we can better this world? We love the work of those that train us to never despair. But maybe they’ve got it wrong...

What will stop this downward turn? Anything? Is it possible that we can?

Presumably all of us who work in the cultural industries believe in Art. We believe in the transformational power of art to change hearts and minds. We’ve seen and felt art change our hearts and minds. And we dug it and wanted to share it. And it gave our lives purpose. Making art and getting it seen gives us a way to use our labor in service of something bigger than ourselves.